Lobster
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The Lobster Guy (END)
She shook her head at him. “But you’re not a lobster, Truman. You’re a man. A real man. And you don’t need butter and lemon to prove that to me. Get in the water.” Continue reading
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The Lobster Guy (Ten)
“I want ice cream, not toothpaste. I think I’ll go with the cherry chocolate delight in a sugar cone please,” Truman decided. Continue reading
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The Lobster Guy (Nine)
“And if you were truly my friend, you wouldn’t force such a thing upon me. I’m not a killer. I’m a lover of lobster. I’m a lover of life!” Continue reading
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The Lobster Guy (Eight)
“I don’t know if I can go back to his table,” Maggie said. “He’s crushing my positive Red Lobster vibe, and I’m just not okay with that.” Continue reading
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The Lobster Guy (Seven)
Truman took in a shocked breath and sat back in the booth. “You just blew my mind, my eerie lobster friend. There I was this whole time, rotting away in Neptune, Nebraska, breaking chicken necks and punching a register at some shitty grocery store. There I was, pining over a woman I could never have.… Continue reading
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The Lobster Guy (Six)
“We’re going to spend the day together. And despite your crushing heartbreak at the hands and mouth and other unspeakable orifices of that evil woman… We are going to have a good time. A very good time.” Continue reading
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The Lobster Guy (Five)
And what he saw there made his eyes spiral in angry madness like a psychotic clown. Continue reading
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The Lobster Guy (Four)
Excerpt: “I don’t really care about losing my job anymore,” Truman said. “I’m on the brink of catastrophe. I just want to see you. You’re so fetching, and I had such a miserable day. I need to be held.” Continue reading
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The Lobster Guy (Three)
Excerpt: The moronic monotony of it all was murder, Truman thought to himself, as he robotically scanned groceries, pushed buttons, and took money. Continue reading
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The Lobster Guy (Two)
Excerpt: “I could, and I would if I lived there instead of this shithole. I would eat lobster every damn day, and you know what, if you came to visit me, I wouldn’t let you have any lobster at all. I’d say to you, ‘No lobster roll for you, Mr. Munich,’ and then I’d tell… Continue reading
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